Archive for 2010|Yearly archive page

Dignity & Success

In some of my best freinds on October 11, 2010 at 4:01 pm

Unless you live under a rock you know I’ve pissed off some gay people (and they ARE a little sensitive, you should see my nephew!). This may spell trouble for my campaign as New York City is 85% homosexual.

But I have a solution. I’m expanding my Dignity Corps to include training for homosexuals — effective immediately.

Please join me in setting the record and the heinous lies the MSM tells regarding my relationship to the gay community straight.

And, if you know anyone “of that persuasion” try to set THEM straight too. In fact, the whole gay community needs to get straight, ASAP! These smears will not stand.


Thug Life: The REMIX!

In gangsta on October 8, 2010 at 5:45 pm

Check out my fresh new remix!

Even Alan Colmes Hasn’t Seen My Obama Video!

In radio antichrists on October 5, 2010 at 3:43 pm

Didn't get through entire video? Here's the image a... on Twitpic

I’ve already bragged to you about how little the media cares about my emails!

But last night, I was on Alan Colmes’ nationally syndicated Fox News radio show! Guess what? he was stumped too:

SMCS Calls Alan Colmes! (audio clip)

If uber-liberals like Alan don’t bother getting the facts on the material I sent, who will bother?? LOL I’m SO WINNING this election. THANKS ALAN!!

How To Break Copyright Laws and Influence People!

In copywrong on October 2, 2010 at 8:22 pm

Well, you saw me fuck Mickey Mouse© already! Now let’s fuck NINTENDO! Yaaay! (No condom needed!)

Step One: Find Some Artwork You Have No Rights To:

This can be ANYTHING. Barbie© even (fucking HER sounds good, don’t it?). Major motion pictures. Any image that you like, TAKE IT. The lawyers won’t notice … besides, don’t you have the cojones to STEAL?  Yeah, buddy, FUCK Nintendo!!

Step Two: Hire Your Cousin A Graphic Designer To Photoshop It!

Thats it! You’re done. You got FREE (five finger discount) ART and the Bar Association is TOTALLY not noticing. Lawsuit? HA!! Like me winning, it’s NEVER GONNA HAPPEN.

It’s All About The Benjamins!

In pay me bitches on October 2, 2010 at 5:02 pm

CASH motherfucker! I'll take you out if I don't see mad cabbage soon, bitch-ass!

Remember when I told you all I “don’t need money?” Fuck that shit.

… to make it all work, Paladino’s strategists say they still will need to raise another $12 million in the coming seven weeks to be competitive with Cuomo in the advertising wars on television, mailings sent to voters’ homes and over the Internet.

“I do acknowledge the fundraising gap is a challenge. We’re facing it,” Caputo said.

That guy ain’t wrong. We didn’t pay him $41K in September for nothin!

But no worries, I ain’t to proud to beg.

For real … I’m better at begging than my dog! Shit, I just begged me up 275 K, a lot from hard-working lugs who needed to put that shit on their CREDIT CARDS. LOL, that’s GHETTO!

These suckers will provide cab fare and pizza, but when it comes to real cheddar, you gotta hit up the BIG DOGS. THESE motherfuckers gave me $37K! That cab will take your ass to CHINA.

Will the press bother to tell “the people” (LOL) that my largest contributor is the union-busting, pro big-business ABC PAC? A tiny little arm of the subtly-named Vote For Business PAC? I’m betting on no.

Paladino for The People!

Business people!

Anderson Cooper: Dumbass & Lazy Journalist

In stupid white guys on September 27, 2010 at 7:19 pm

Boy did he miss the boat on this one! IMAGINE if he had shown his viewers the WHOLE “Obama Inaguration Rehersal” video I sent to all my email buddies:

Shit, imagine the reaction if he just mentioned that the African tribal dance had the theme from “The Jeffersons” as its soundtrack! What a lazy fuck Anderson Cooper is. LOL… thank GOD!

Worse what if he actually WATCHED it till the end! HELLOOO!!!

Didn't get through entire video? Here's the image a... on Twitpic

Good thing the media is asleep at the wheel. WHEW.

Tweet This Shit!

In animal lovers on September 27, 2010 at 7:04 pm

Polacks, Dagos, Wops and even those other “sensitive” types LOVE to see my latest gaffes, guffaws, and #horseporn FUN. It’s EASY. If Mike Capauto can figure it out, you sure can!

Don’t miss my tweets!